Envy

I will never openly admit that I want an obnoxiously close, tight-knit family. You know the ones that send the entire neighborhood cheesy Christmas cards with them, on the cover of it, dressed as various types of reindeer. 

I will never say I want to feel comfortable to be open about things in my life. That I don't have to fear for my own personal well being and to have a fear of being completely disowned or worst them wanting to "fix me". 

I won't say that I want that in my life, because I will probably never have that. There's no point in me trying to convince them about something that they strongly are against. They would rather deny themselves and believe in other things that they consider true than face the fact that I am who I have always wanted to be, who I need to be and I can't and won't change for the sake of their happiness because I matter too. What I say matters, but no. Apparently it doesn't.

Yours truly,

Ez